The Three Musketeers the Three Musketeers Funny

• Aramis' introductory scene. He's a lovely young blonde's theology tutor, simply unfortunately she's married.

  Aramis: Nosotros must pray for our sins!
  (The young lady'south husband, a Cardinal'due south baby-sit, bursts in and fires a shot at him, missing narrowly)
  Aramis: Second idea, God's ofttimes decorated.

• Rochefort... isn't that a smelly kind of cheese?
• Porthos claims the sash D'Artagnan merely ruined was a gift from "the Queen of America." D'Artagnan calling him out on this Critical Enquiry Failure is what gets him into a duel. And later on he reveals himself by bringing up "the Czarina of Tokyo."
• D'Artagnan thinks he'due south a real badass...perhaps a little also much.

  Athos: Your manners accept not improved however. You're late.
  D'Artagnan: You in a hurry to die?
  Athos: (Porthos and Aramis arrive) Here come the grave diggers now.
  Porthos: Athos, you cannot fight this male child.
  Athos: Why not?
  Porthos: I'm fighting him.
  D'Artagnan: Not until 1 o'clock.
  Aramis: I have a duel with him too.
  D'Artagnan: Not until ii o'clock.

  • Shortly thereafter:

  Athos: Only a fool would try and arrest us twice in one twenty-four hour period.
  Jussac: You're under arrest.
  Aramis and Porthos: (in unison) A fool.
  Jussac: Are you coming peacefully or do you intend to resist?
  Porthos: Oh don't be so stupid, of course we intend to resist! Just requite the states a moment, all right?

  • The guards then actually wait to assail until the Musketeers accept finished conferring with one another and Porthos announces "Now we're prepared to resist you!". This is actually Truth in Television, as it was considered very bad form to start a duel before someone was ready. The niceties must be observed, after all.
• During the battle with the Cardinal'south guards, the Musketeers accept all defeated their opponents. Aramis points out that D'Artagnan is fighting on the roof.

  Athos: (in the most deadpan voice possible) My God, he's still alive.

• When D'Artagnan confesses to Richelieu that he was planning to bring together the Musketeers, Richelieu'southward reaction, including the tone of his voice, boils down to "You haven't read the news much lately, have you?"

  Richelieu: Bad timing.
  D'Artagnan: So I've heard.

• When rescuing D'Artagnan from execution, Aramis shoots one of the guards and makes the sign of the cross with the smoking pistol.
• The Musketeers, having rescued D'Artagnan from the executioner'south cake, hijack the Cardinal's coach, and Aramis and Porthos investigate its contents while Athos drives:

  Porthos: Champagne?
  Athos: Nosotros're in the middle of a hunt, Porthos.
  Porthos: You lot're right - something red.
  (shortly after)
  Porthos: For a chase, the Cardinal recommends his fantabulous '24 Cabernet. (bated to D'Artagnan) Yous can't have any, you're too young.

  • Meanwhile D'Artagnan is just looking at Porthos like he's crazy, which probably isn't too far off...
  • And Athos just grabs the bottle and starts chugging, after handing the reins to D'Artagnan
  • "Aha! The Cardinal's sacred snack chamber!"
• "The manly fine art of wenching." The entire scene.
• The part where the ugly dungeon guard suddenly screams at Porthos after beingness impaled by spikes in the back seems more funny than scary.

  D'Artagnan: Where have y'all been?
  Porthos: Taking care of something ugly!

• At the end of the movie, D'Artagnan has just been made a Musketeer and is talking to the title trio nigh what comes next for them, when Girard and his brothers, who were pursuing D'Artagnan earlier in the movie, spot him:

  D'Artagnan: So what practise nosotros do now? What's next?
  Porthos: Well, nosotros protect the King...
  Aramis: ...Protect the Queen...
  Porthos: ...In the name of God... And France, right?
  Aramis: France indeed.
  (Girard and his brothers have defenseless up with D'Artagnan. At the other terminate of the street they depict swords)
  Girard: D'Artagnan! My sister'due south honor will non wait a moment longer.
  D'Artagnan: I'll handle this.
  Porthos: D'Artagnan, we as well protect each other.
  D'Artagnan: All for one.
  Aramis, Porthos, Athos: And one for all.
  (Girard's eyes widen)
  Girard: RUN!
  The movie ends with Girard and brothers fleeing as the unabridged Musketeer corps chases them, with an overhead shot of a steady stream of blue tunics down the street.

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Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/TheThreeMusketeers1993

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